Sheeple Magazine March Archive

Cell Phones Are Now Treated As Bombs?

By Jamin Greensbury at 03/04/08 15:09

We just had an incident at the Kickapoo Area High School. Some students were caught with vulgar and disgusting videos on their cell phones. Now these students have screwed the rest of us over. Since only a handful of students were caught with the videos, the entire student populace has to suffer. Cell phone usage is now strictly illegal and if you're caught with one, then may God have mercy on you. If you resist a teacher who is taking your phone from you, you could be given criminal charges.

So now that phones are the most illegal item in our school, you'd think that other things would be more important. Like smoking at school or other electronic devices for example. I can still run through the halls with my iPod raised shouting "iPod!" and not get in as much trouble as holding my phone and not even using it. If you have a phone, you pretty much have a bomb at the KAHS.